January 18, 2012
January 02, 2012
The Rev has NOT left the building in 2012!
OK I was over it - I was over the whole "blogging" thing but ya-know the Rev. My man just can't keep his mouth shut (or his blog idle). So since we are at the dawn of a new year and we don't quite know if it will be as totally suck-ass as 2011, let's find a few trends we don't need to perpetuate so that maybe we'll have a better time of it next year.
1. Bitching about our "privacy" - The people bitching about their "privacy" are always the ones that have a gazillion freaking connections to the web and the mobile sphere and have clicked yes to more Terms and Conditions than they can remember. They are the kind of people that have a password folder on their desktop. They have Google, Hotmail, Yahoo and Earthlink accounts. They post every five minutes on twitter, foursquare, G+, facebook, typapad, flickr, tumblr, Linkedin, get all their music off "the cloud" which they share through their linked Spotify account, and post throughout the day what they ate, what color socks they have on, who they're dating, how healthy they're last BM was and where they bought their tampons. Who needs Big Brother when we've entered the era of uber-sharing.
Police Slog Through 40,000 Insipid Party Pics To Find Cause Of Dorm Fire
2. Fees - Really Verizon? You didn't learn from the freaking banks and Netflix. Let's talk bout grade school level economics. When the economy is in the shitter then chances are people WON'T BE HAPPY ABOUT PAYING MORE ya dang idjits! We don't give a shit how good your damn customer service is when we don't have freaking jobs.
3. Startups - Another example of history repeating? Was the tech bubble really that far back? Was it? See if no one has noticed there is this huge cottage industry of "developers" creating "apps" and "enterprise level software" that "maximizes the social marketing presence of your brand." Let me explain - basically there's a fuckload of yahoos making crap that services and exploits social media. This industry is servicing the social marketing needs of everyone from the big boy advertisers (who are clueless to social media metrics) down to the mom and pop advertisers (who are clueless to social media metrics). If you ever read CrunchBase (back before they got bought and didn't suck) this year you'd see that every day millions are paid in angel capitol to companies who's mission statements are so convoluted you couldn't tell what the hell it was that they did. Of course until you went on their site and then realize they help you get "Liked" on Facebook. People - when there are no hard assets in an industry except "intellectual property" and there are so many fish in the pond - it's only natural a shit load of them starve and they leave nothing behind in the economy - nothing to sell off so that money invested in these companies basically goes pfft. Gone. Into the the ether, never to recirculate again into the economy. But hopefully, if it does happen, we'll first see another big Clinton-era-esque upswing in the market first after all these coke addled entrepreneurs go public. Then once again we can get those $75,000 a year jobs licking nouveau riche corporate bunghole right out of college!
The Startup: A Less Productive Alternative to Unemployment -- powered by Cracked.com
4. Cupcake, Meatball, Beer, Sea Salt - Basically specialty craft stores. Enough already! By my office they closed the store where I bought my..
- Cigarettes
- Gum
- Soda/Water/Juice/Coffee
- Power Bars
- Newspapers
- Lotto Tickets
- Cheapo Emergency Umbrellas
You know what they opened? A store that sells nothing but ARTISINAL KOREAN RED GINSENG! Because that's what we need. It's freaking ridiculous already. It's going to get to the place where we're opening specialty Latvian Shark Urine Infused Truffle Oil emporiums! Specializing is one thing but how can local commerce subsist on nothing but flavor of the month specialty boutiques?
5. OWS vs. The Tea Party - please just hug it out and make nice - you're basically all pissed about the same things on the top level. If ya'll just got together on the economy and fair taxation you can go back to arguing about whatever misinformed, deluded, one-sided, web-fueled conspiracy theories you all have after we all have jobs and our houses stop being foreclosed on. It's much easier to research FEMA Death Camps and Global Warming when your electricity doesn't' get shut off.
Part II Pending but till then what would you all like to see less of this year?
November 26, 2010
September 03, 2010
new top 10 just for your asses
I am sooooooo bored - therefore I blog. Yes I know the Rev has not been good to you all but keep an eye out. I'm coming back with new crap!
Next Top 10 for ya'll!
1. Eataly! Have the freaking pasta. It's the shit!
2. If you are worrying about your date's facial hair, here is a way to know if he will pick up the bill, throw you a roofie, go Hollywood ra(c)pist ape-shit on you or try to eat you.
3. Calcium is good for you(r eyes)
4. Baffling Buffalos! Please explain this to me... "
"Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo"
...how it is correct English grammar - yes I know mine sucketh - but really HOW!?
5. Dear Mr. Pryor. You are missed.
6. Did you know that the Cookie Monster was initially created to appear as a commercial spokes muppet?
7. This is AWESOME!
Logorama from Marc Altshuler - Human Music on Vimeo.
8. I choose the box too!
The Button - watch more funny videos
9.Who's with me?
10. Finally, I can't believe I didn't think of this back when I was dating Meghan Fox!
May 10, 2010
10 things - better late than never...
OK OK OK Already - I'll freaking update the blog more often. Stop yer nagging already.
10 things I found this week you may find cool?
1. My girlfriend's friend has a commuter blog and a Grand Central fetish. She got in a "Ms. Grand Central" ensemble and had a photo-shoot at the transit hub. Awesome.
2. I knew it - Bono is the devil!
3. And the creepiest porn of the week is "It's Ok - She's My Stepdaughter." If there isn't enough deviant sex online for you right now you can fantasize about creepy old men and statutory rape.
4. Harvesting organs from dangerous criminals made into hipster friendly cartoons...
5. I just found how you can annoy every last person in your office for hours!
6. To the Cat Cave - shit I ate Robin!
7. Beware hipsters - the grifter is back and she wants your trust fund!
8. Jet Packs for X-Mas!
9. Be happy you don't live in one of these cities - oh wait - some of you do - oopsie.
10. Finally - awesome photos of horrible people!
March 28, 2010
The Rev ABIDES! CAM'RON to join XXL Freshmen Show
Folks,
As many of you know The Rev.'s involved in putting together a big XXL Highline Ballroom Show. Well as if the show wasn't amazing to begin with including performances with Big Sean, Freddie Gibbs, Donnis, Nipsey Hu$$le, PILL and Jay Rock - I was recently informed we'd be getting a performance by CAM'RON & THE U.N.! Oh Yeah - More info HERE!
March 06, 2010
10 New Tings to Make Ya Tink!
Here's your new 10 things to make your day. A new list of weirdness, madness and whimsy ya bastiches!
1. I've thought to myself - that's it - I can see nothing as weird and nerdy as I've seen at multiple Cosplay events or Comiccon's I've been to, then I came across the below dress then the saddest part was I started to think - hey I bet you my girl would love this.
2. The "Do No Evil" monkey: Oh yeah you've heard of "See no...", "Hear no...", "Speak no..." but did you no there was a "DO NO EVIL" monkey - note where his hands are and how happy he is.
3. If dreams could come true...
4. Speaking of dreams - the sex machine death races!
5. And more dreams - office fun camouflage!
6. I say - please raise your cups and have a high hardy huzzah for his Royal Manliness Lord Likely.
7. MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY I SWEAR HE FOLLOWED ME HOME (gnawing on my femur the whole time and I think he's rabid) CAN I KEEP HIM PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE??
9. Yet another closeted anti-gay Republiqueer!
10. and finally no no NONONONO NOOOOOO! So wrong!
Amen!
February 28, 2010
Your moment of hell
Thought you all would like this.
February 10, 2010
February 09, 2010
XXL Haiti Benefit at Webster Hall 2NITE!
Remember tonight -
The XXL Benefit for Haiti at Webster Hall! Jim Jones, Juelz Santana, Styles P, DJ Kay Slay, Mike Epps! If you don't come everyone will think you don't love Haiti! Don't be hatin'!
Ticket available here! http://websterhall.com/events/show_event_sub.php?id=881&size=small&cdate=2010-02-09
the Rev. Spyro
I'm tall, slightly frustrated, fun having, not sleeping, changing always...
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