OK OK I know - you've been starving to find out who made the first douche list of 2008. Well how about we start with...
1. The WTC Developers - OK they are actively looking to put a restaurant up high! Novel idea pre 9/11 but now it's more of a thrill ride. "Hello diners and thank you for coming to the New Windows on the World. If you look to your right bay window, you'll see TWA flight 914 delivering your appetizer." Jesus please keep our restaurants on the ground.
2. FUCKING SPITZER! - Grow a set of balls you weasel and get our NYC schools the $10Million you fucking promised asshole! I never trusted this beady eyed lizard looking drip.
3. Tom Brady- OK let me get this straight - a few weeks before the Superbowl you just happen to be strolling through the cold streets of New York with a HUGE bouquet of flowers to bring to your super-model girlfriend when you could have taken a cab. Well maybe the "unbeatable" Pats ARE worried about Big Blue if they have to fucking resort to PR head-games and stunts. Injury my ass - of course secretly I really hope Tom's in horrible pain.
4. Ted Kennedy - AAAK Ted what are you doing? Please keep your cursed Kennedy influence away from Obama before you get him drunk, into a paternity suit or killed! You Kennedys are BAD NEWS! Stay away from one of the only even marginally decent candidate sPLEASE!
5. And one of my favorite regular DOUCHES - the NEW YORK CITY MTA! What's this I hear? A fare hike? I am SOOOO surprised and and what else? The Fulton St. hub in lower Manhattan is a complete cluster fuck? NO KIDDING? For those of you holding out for the 2nd Ave.tunnel - don't hold your breath because it won't happen in our lifetime.
Stay tuned for douches and douchiness in future posts.