The Rev. Spyros' Snake Oil Emporium

Polar Bears and Coney Blues.

I left today to get to a public assembly of people pissed at the current state of affairs at Coney Island who were meeting down by Astroland Park.  I missed the protest because the G line is the slowest moving train in the Universe.  I made my way to the beach thinking at least I can catch the Polar Bear Club's annual dip into icy waters of the Atlantic. 

I was completely bummed because of all the "Stores For Lease" signs on Ruby's and the surrounding businesses...

...but felt better when I ran into Rob Leddy (the handsome devil below) curator of the most excellent Coney Island Film Festival.

So as we froze our bits off on the beach in the January wind,  I started to feel like a complete pussy watching a new, younger generation of Polar Bears made up of all ages and all walks of life, charge into the water - note with the wind chill today it was close to NEGATIVE 4 DEGREES out there.  I don't buy all the health benefits of ice-cold bathing crap, but I do appreciate the level of balls it takes.  These cats were warriors.  This shit was primal!

I was standing there in a fat goose down jacket, boots, gloves and a hat, shivering and these brilliant maniacs where posing for pictures soaking wet in fucking swimsuits.  I am SUCH a pussy!

I wandered over by the newly renovated and kitsch-tastic Freak Bar to say hi to some of the good folks from Coney Island USA and get some hot cocoa because as I said, I'm a pussy.  Did I mention how much of a pussy I am? 

I had the pleasure of Fred Khal's company of This or That fame - (below right) who introduced me to the Rev. Billy! (below left). 

Yes!  That guy from that What Would Jesus Buy movie, who's on a mission to keep Americans from shopping.  I asked him how the crusade was going and he said, "...have you read the papers?  People are definitely not shopping..." Unfortunately I don't think the current economic situation is what his message had in mind.

I made it back home happy but exhausted and pissed at what we'll be losing out in Coney Island.  Folks, you all know I'm not huge on causes but I'm telling you all, where there's a voice there is hope!  Yell at the right people in local Government!  They work for us! Get involved - don't let what is amazing about Coney go the way of the Dodo.  Speak up - since the economy went tits up who knows what may happen if you decide to make yourself heard. 

God Save Coney Island!

Amen.

Save Coney Island! Please!

Do I really have to tell everyone what's going on?
Coney Island is getting fucked.  The developers that have bought in are planning on dropping ugly ass hotels and malls in our playground and much like the price of gas, the price of smokes, the price of milk and the constant delays on New York Transit we can't do anything about it. Or can we?

1. Visit the Coney Island message boards, sign up and chime in (positively/constructively) often - there is power in numbers.  It also helps you to find out what's up.

2. Write to/call the following people and tell them we don't need another mall - we need rides, cotton candy, fried clams, funnel cakes and games.
Rachel Belsky, New York City Economic Development Corporation rbelsky@nycedc.com, Telephone: (212) 312–3718, Fax: (212) 312–3989

Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg, City Hall, New York, NY 10007
Phone 311 (or 212-NEW-YORK outside NYC)
Fax (212) 788-2460, E-MAIL:http://www.nyc.gov/html/mail/html/mayor.html

City Council President Christine Quinn, and your City Council Member. 
http://council.nyc.gov/html/members/members.shtml

3.  Publicly denounce Dominic Recchia - he's become a cheerleader for Thor Equities - the evil developers behind this vile plot to further destroy our fine city. Anytime I see a politician  take  sides with big business over his constituency I smell  a  rat.  Make sure he knows he works for you not Thor.

4. Fuck the Post - recently the New York Post ousted Dick Zigun - who runs Coney Island U.S.A. for crashing in his office at Coney.  This could endanger their grant status and get Dick fined and as you might know Dick isn't a rich man.   Either way, at the end of the day I don't think tax payers gave a shit that Dick slept in his office. The timing is dubious as Dick recently denounced THOR Equities and the CIDC - the organization created by the city to further help ruin your summer fun.

5.  Visit the Save Coney Island website http://www.myspace.com/saveconeyisland for the facts.

6.  Email Save.Coney@gmail.com to join the mailing list for news of upcoming protests, petitions and more!

7.  Write to the following companies that have been rumored to be taking space in the upcoming Coney Island mall and tell them what a terrible idea it will be for them to open stores there
So far we hear Nike and Toys R Us.

8.  Here's my contribution to this - we should start a myspace/facebook/blog campaign supporting Dick - our slogan can be  - "So you think the resident of Coney Island, Brooklyn and New York City can't make you listen to what we want for Coney - then you don't know DICK!"  Hopefully if we get enough play the Daily News will make it a headline.

9. Stay informed and don't be a fair weather supporter.  This battle doesn't end when the Summer is over.  Keep the struggle alive in the cold months so you can enjoy Coney in the warm ones.

Think to yourself - how many stories do I have about Coney Island?  How many good times?  Was the batting cage your thing or the go carts?  The Cyclone?  The Sideshow?  Ruby's?  Shoot the Freak? Whatever the case it will all be going away.  You are watching you neighborhoods change into condo  havens every day - your local bodegas are all Starbucks now - every neighborhood that had any character (East Village, LES, Hells Kitchen, Williamsburg)  has become a post-college town playground for douchey transplant morons with trust funds and too much free time and now we have the Coney Island mall staring us in the face.  Aren't you ready to draw a line in the sand yet?